How to be Good Enough
Being a human is hard.
I don’t know if you have ever felt that way, but I have. We have to do so many things just to be good enough in today’s world.
We have to exercise, take the right supplements, and eat well. We have to look good enough managing things like our skin, our bodies, and the clothes we wear. We have to learn to be good workers and parents and children and partners and much, much more. And each of these things is a universe in of itself.
For example, even something as simple as eating right is difficult. You have to manage intolerances, define what a diverse, nutritious meal looks like for you, and learn how to cook. You have to deal with addictions, cravings, and bouts of negative self talk because of body issues. And that doesn’t even include stuff like budgeting for food and time management. Like I said, a universe in itself. And that’s one of the easy ones. Imagine the hidden components in something like “being a good partner.”
I’m not trying to give you an anxiety attack lol, just trying to make you realize that being “good enough” is not a simple task.
As a kid, I told myself I would write a book called “The Handbook for Life” when I became an adult. It would contain everything you needed to know about living a good life. Now I realize life isn’t that easy. You don’t suddenly get the answers when you become an adult.
The only thing you realize as an adult is that nobody (not even your parents or older siblings) can know everything.
Life is too vast.
We must take the foundational knowledge that our parents (and older siblings) gave us and venture out. We must look for second and third fathers and mothers.
I found multiple parents and “older brothers” (some of them were younger in age, but older in specific wisdom) who took me under their wing and taught me about a certain aspect of life they were best at.
In my life, I want to do the same. I want to use myself as a guinea pig. So that in my writing, I can be your big brother. Cut through the bullshit and teach you how to live the good enough life without the overwhelm. That way, you can put all your blood, sweat, and tears into that thing you’re trying to be great at.
Hopefully, I can make human-ing less hard.
Regardless here’s this week's letter from big bro:
This Week's Embrace Your Lazy
My Habit of the Week: A Great Beauty Journal.
Every evening write 1-3 things that happened that were moments of great beauty. At first, it’s hard. By writing that every evening you learn to lower the bar for what qualifies as a “Great Beauty moment”, but more importantly you notice great beauty more deeply in your life. To write in your journal, you become present and realize how awe-inspiring life can be. It’s still difficult, but I’ve found moments of beauty that put my problems in perspective and made me appreciate life more. For example, a certain guitar riff, an amused smile from a friend, and even a shade of sunlight can have Great Beauty.
Notice it.
It’s all around you.
My Question of the Week:
What is the lead domino in my life? What's one small thing that I can do today that would make my life easier? Hint: lazy habits (making your bed, meditation, a quick walk in the sun or in nature) are small changes that make big differences.
🧫This Week's Petri Dish
1.
A beautiful bit of eye candy from Cody Klintworth's gorgeous Instagram page. I found this from Gianluca's newsletter Through The Noise
2.
My dude is out here freestyling based on what people say on Omegle. This is just straight up...BARS. Check it out:
3. This is some of the cleverest marketing I've seen.
friend Bryan Lee wrote a great article about mentorship a little while ago, here’s an excerpt.
Many of us flail through life without a north star to guide us. When it comes to making big, life-altering decisions, we’re paralyzed by the sheer number of choices and their implications. We’re often at the mercy of our current mood. Feeling agitated? Screw it, it wouldn’t work out anyway. Feeling elated? It’s a long shot, but I’m feeling lucky.
Wouldn’t it be great to have the perfect mentor guiding us through our chaotic life? One that understood us in our entirety and knew of our loftiest dreams and goals? One that was always there when we needed them most, whether under deadline or mid-crisis? One that had an over-abundance of confidence that we could tap into whenever ours flagged?
As Bryan explains, you already have that perfect mentor. That mentor is your future self.
Your future self has your best interests at heart. He (She) is always there for you and ready at a moment’s notice. Your future self is the best mentor to help you become a great human.
Because he(she) knows the unique traps you fall into. And so, is the perfect person to remind you of what you continually forget.
It’s weird, but almost everything I write feels like I’m writing from the future. And he’s always reminding me of things I need to hear.
He reminds me to stop.
To look around and notice the Great Beauty around me.
That achieving is not as important as being.
That God, as one of my favorite movies points out, exists in the spaces between us.
“I believe if there’s any kind of God it wouldn’t be in any of us, not you or me but just this little space in between. If there’s any kind of magic in this world it must be in the attempt of understanding someone sharing something. I know, it’s almost impossible to succeed but who cares really? The answer must be in the attempt.” - Before Sunrise
And so he reminds me, I must be wary of places I'm using accomplishing as an excuse for not connecting.
If you want to live a good enough life take some time to listen to your future self. I do that with writing.
I write to hear my future self talk to me.
I write to feel alive.
I write to remember, that as hard as being a human is, all it takes is a good movie, a personal car karaoke session, or a hug to realize
Life is worth it.